A Two letter Word that Packs a Punch: N-O
A favorite word among most toddlers: N-O. A two letter word that packs a punch, shooting many parents’ heart rates up. Toddlers love this word so much that half the time they don’t know what they’re saying NO to! If you find yourself at a stand-off with your tiny human, follow these tips below:
STAY CALM. Your child has a heightened ability to sense the energy around him or her. Children feed off of the adults around them. If you want your toddler calm, you must be demonstrating that behavior.
State what you want versus what you don’t want.
Example: “Come sit by me” not “Don’t sit on that”
Offer an alternative. If your child is throwing rocks into the street, they’re showing you the need for stimulation and their activity of choice is to throw something.
Example: “I see you want to throw. The rocks are not for throwing. You can throw this ball over there”.
Offer two choices. Asking open ended questions leads to unnecessary “no” responses.
Example: “Would you like this shirt or that shirt? Would you like these grapes or these strawberries?”; not “what do you want to wear? What do you want to eat?”
Give a five minute and two minute warning. Have your child select the activity he or she would like to do after time is up. Screen time is a common trigger these days and parents find themselves in a stand-off, saying “no” when their child incessantly asks for more time. When your kiddo is frustrated that screen time is over, validate the frustration and provide a reminder of the activity they selected.
Example: This is also a great time to be that broken record. Stay calm and continue to repeat “I see you are frustrated” “I know it is hard. iPad time is over, here is the activity you picked out”.
Aeriel Feeback LSCSW, LCSW