CBT: Rewrite Your Thoughts

At the core of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is the idea that our thoughts influence our emotions and behaviors. Therefore, changing our thoughts can change our overall outlook on ourselves and the world around us. 

So how does it work? First we need to understand how thoughts become beliefs. When we think the same thought over and over and over, it eventually becomes a belief. When we expose ourselves to the same ideas they become familiar and comfortable to us. Typically, these types of ideas are limiting, negative, unhelpful, or simply hurtful to us.

Now when working to change these thoughts or rewrite our limiting beliefs it can feel uncomfortable or even dangerous to consider different more positive or helpful thoughts. When I introduce this work with my clients they often describe how fake it feels, or uncomfortable it makes them. Why? Because your old patterns of thought are safe, they have been with you for so long they have made a comfortable space in your mind. Therefore, when reframing our limiting thoughts it feels unfamiliar and unsafe. 

So how do we combat this? Exposure. By exposing ourselves to these new patterns of thought we can warm up to them and get familiar with how they feel. Do this regularly and these new thoughts will seem more comfortable the more you expose yourself to them. The key though, is to recognize when the old thoughts arise and replace them with the new thought you are warming up to, the beliefs you ultimately want to hold. This is interrupting old patterns of thought to create space for new ones. 

Here’s an example: 

Triggering event: Making a mistake at
work

Automatic old belief: “I am so stupid”

*recognize the thought is present*

Insert new belief: “Everyone makes mistakes, I am learning as I go”

Repeat

Why can this be challenging? Ultimately because it’s a radical act of self love. By choosing to replace limiting beliefs and thoughts with supportive, helpful ones you are choosing to change the way you think and feel about yourself. You are choosing to love and support you and the way you ultimately want to feel. 

Morgan Riley, LMSW