How Do I Find The Right Therapist?
Finding the right therapist is like finding the right girlfriend or wife…. you may have to try out a few different ones before you find a good fit. It is perfectly acceptable to go to a therapist for a few sessions and then decide its not what you are looking for. A good therapist should point you in the right direction if you aren’t getting your needs met. Below are a few things to think about asking your therapist during your first session or during your first phone conversation:
Theory- Every therapist derives their practice from some specific modality, often one that they study during graduate school or after and there are thousands of different modalities to use and reasons to use them. Some therapists come from a psychoanalytic perspective which focuses on repression and concepts from Freud, while others use hypnotherapy in order to create subconscious change in a client. I tend to use cognitive behavioral therapy which is a short term, practical therapy evidenced based theory that works to change the ways our thoughts impact our actions. Always ask your therapist, “What type of therapy do you practice?” and have them explain it to you. If they are unwilling or unable to, you may want to find someone new.
Personality- This one is less a specific question you can ask and more a feeling. Does this person communicate in a way that you find to be effective? Do you enjoy talking to them? Do they seem trustworthy? Do you feel as though they actually may be able to help you? If you answered no to any of the above questions, it probably isn’t a good fit with your personality. If you answered yes to all of the above questions- then congratulations- you have found a good therapist for you!
Length of time and availability- Some therapists believe in long term therapy that takes a number of years, while others may focus your work within a month. Certain therapists may only have monthly availability or may demand that you must come weekly, while others are more flexible. Its also not uncommon for therapists to have little evening or weekend availability, especially if they are booked. I tend to recommend more frequent sessions in the beginning and tapering them down as more progress is made, and often check in with the client to see how they think they are doing on progress. If your therapist feels you need long term therapy, but you feel 3 months is enough- it may not be a good fit. Having this conversation during the first few sessions can help you ensure that you are getting your needs met.
Credentials- Therapists must go through a minimum of 2 years of graduate school in order to practice. After completing school it is best to continue on through post-graduate work and continue towards clinical licensure, which can take a number of years. It is important to ask your therapist what they are licensed in and it is very appropriate to go to the state credentialing board website to verify. In the state of Kansas it is below:
https://www.kansas.gov/bsrb-verification/index.do
Trust your gut- Ultimately you often will know within a matter of minutes if a therapist has the potential to be a good fit for you or not. If you aren’t feeling any connection or think something is just “off”, finish the session and let them know. It can be good a good practice in assertive communication to simply say “Im not sure if this is the right fit, do you have another recommendation for me?”
Amber Reed, LSCSW
Resolve - Counseling & Wellness
Serving areas of Prairie Village, Overland Park, Leawood, and Shawnee Mission KS
MORE BY AMBER
